Trying not to live in a …

shit hole, I took it upon myself to purchase a few items off the internet with some money mum gave me for Christmas.  The house is a mess building site and no matter what I do, I can never seem to get it clean or looking nice.  It doesn’t help when certain persons:

1. Vomit on the carpet (whilst pissed) and then refuse to admit it was them the following morning and then won’t clear it up.
2. Throw their dinner (whilst pissed) across the floor.
3. Tip their dinner (whilst pissed) down the sofa.
4. Spill their drinks across the floor (this doesn’t necessarily have to be whilst pissed) and not clear it up.
5. Empty their ashtray (whilst pissed) all over the carpet, then tread the ash and tobacco in, and then won’t clear it up.
6. Stagger uncontrollably around the room, grab the sofa and rip the arm material.
7. Generally dribble, piss, fart and scratch all over the place.

(However Cat didn’t help the other night when, having scoffed too much, proceeded to bring it all back up on.the.carpet. whilst we were actually having dinner!  Funnily enough I couldn’t eat any more!)

So, the wonderful M&S was having a bit of a sale so I bought some of these in their 3 for 2 offer, although I got them in “mocha” .. and then I bought one of these so that I could cover up the un-removable stains and wouldn’t, at least, have to look at them .. and then, to cover the sofa I got two of these in the hope that I could make the sofa look a bit better!

So far, I’ve only got the cushions and the rug out (and I have a sneaking suspicion that Pig has already tripped over it .. I’m not laughing too much!) as I will do the throw thing at the weekend .. but all Pig could do on Monday night was moan that we didn’t need these things, HE didn’t like them, HE wouldn’t use them, HE would continue to use the vile and extremely squashed cushions we currently have … last night when I got home, he looked very comfortable … ON THE CUSHIONS!  Waste of money .. I think not!

He keeps saying, what is the point of this stuff if we are only going to rip out and make more mess?  Well, for information it took 21 months to do a 6ft x 8ft kitchen .. I haven’t had a third bedroom since we moved in 3 years ago .. the boiler is still by the front door with a bloody great hole in the ceiling with the pipes going up to the first floor and we are using far more gas and electricity than we need to because of all the holes that have been drilled in the house and not filled in or used for what they are meant to be used for, and bloody great holes in the floor where you haven’t replaced floor boards and the draught just loves to creep howl in.

So forgive me for wanting one small space to actually be nice to sit in!